Morag Prunty is the Irish author of several novels under her own name, as well as under her pen name, Kate Kerrigan. She’s married to Niall Kerrigan, an artist, has two boys, and lives in idyllic Killalla on the west coast of Ireland. We met many moons ago when she was the editor and I was a writer for U magazine.
This post about how she parents her fabulous 9-year-old son, Leo.
Morag (expecting her second son) with her son, Leo.
Here’s Leo being interviewed on the news – he won an international competition to create a comic book character that was featured in one of the oldest and best-known comic books on the planet, The Dandy. I don’t know if it’s his accent, his adorability factor, or his deep connection to his own creativity…but this kid blew my socks off:
I asked Morag what she does (or doesn’t do!) to foster his creativity. As a neurotic American hover-mom, I wanted to know what her secret is (if there is one) - how do you raise such a creative child? Is there a recipe? What’s the secret? What did you do? What didn’t you do?
Since she wrote Recipes for a Perfect Marriage, I figured that maybe she knows the recipe for raising a creative child.
It’s a flaw, I know – but after seeing Leo I wanted to interrogate Morag about her parenting theories, and she was kind enough to indulge me.
I have never consciously fostered my son’s creativity – partly because I suppose as a writer and with my husband being an artist – I don’t think “being creative” is such a big deal. In fact, I’d just as soon my kid was sporty or academic.
He has always had access to creative tools – crayons and stuff like any kid – but we run a very technical household and consider computers to be valid creative equipment (my husband is a graphic designer) and TV programs and movies (which I also write) as much a source of inspirational ideas as galleries and books. So rather than restrict technology – we use it all the time, and encourage him to use it too. Leo loves computer games and we are happy for him to play them. Just like “real life” some games are creative and educational and some are violent and moronic – and so far – he’s not been interested in the moronic, gangs-killing-each-other ones so – we’ll cross that bridge.
We are also avid collectors of art ourselves and I am guessing that being surrounded by interesting objects and paintings is as much an influence on our son as his boring old parents writing book and taking photographs! He comes along to gallery openings and book launches and creativity is just what we do.
Morag & her husband, Niall, at a gallery opening.
I believe it’s important to let kids do their thing and not put pressure on them to be one way or the other. I had NO idea Leo was doing the whole comic thing in such a serious way until I saw the clip of him being interviewed on TV (I was not privy to the interview before it aired!) Niall and I never really encouraged it particularly – in fact, his babysitter Romy used to make comic books to amuse him as a small child, and they made up stories together. I think giving kids a broad experience of creative people outside the family is a hugely important influence.
Kids are always looking for role models besides their parents – so fostering friendships with other creative people is important.
Leo takes piano lessons with my friend Helen, and we have NOTHING to do with that at all – (aside from paying her). It’s something between her and him – and he got a distinction in his first exam – so she/we must be doing something right! I make him do ten minutes practice every day before school and he doesn’t mind because there is no telly allowed in our house in the morning.
Being creative is not always about performing or what you produce. We give Leo loads of space to do the things he likes creatively on his own – then – when he is ready to share it with us – we admire and coo – but we are never over-the-top.
Praise is important, but I think there is too much emphasis on making kids feel “special” for being able stick googly eyes on a colour-book frog picture and not enough on fostering concentration and practice in improving their creative work.
Having said that, here are a few of the things we have done to foster our son’s creativity.
- No technology in bedrooms. Not even Nintendo DS. He has all the technology going, but never upstairs – and it’s amazing how much time he chooses to spend up there, especially when friends come around.
- Total access to equipment of his choice. Annoyingly, even though he has oceans of markers and posh paper pads Leo ‘works’ mainly with our family biros (pens) and my computer paper!
- If we are going somewhere, a museum or gallery – we make it fun by getting him to Google them beforehand for us. I took him to Paris for his 9th birthday and he actually knew half the artists in the Pompidou. It was dead cool!
- Reading for pleasure seems to be becoming a thing of the past with kids because there is so much competition. So we “allow” half an hour reading time before lights out in bed, and are buying him a Kindle. We may be sentimental about paper-books but there is no reason to foist that on our kids who will ALL be consuming books on e-readers IF they consume them at all!
You might also like...
My Friend Megan
My Friend Megan – 6 Months Later
It’s World Rare Disease Day
Make a Deck of Cards Valentine
My Inner Hippie Chick
Love the four points at the end. The no-technology and reading are the best of them, goes right along with your elimination of TV. These are great parents, and notice it really isn’t that hard to let children flourish. Although it’s not in her bottom four list, the comment above about the role models is also very interesting. I basically live my the motto that if someone else has done it then I can do it too, which means that whenever I have a tough challenge then one of the first things I do is find people who have succeeded. Great advice for kids too.
Twitter: PerfectingParen
What I love about this post is how it is really the converse of my kill your tv post, yet I so admire her parenting…my extreme way works for me but is clearly not for everyone, and tv ans ds’s etc can work in moderation for lots of families…clearly works here. I’m just not moderate (-:
Twitter: Adothemomalog
I love the points she made about reading and technology. I love reading, and I want my kids to love it too. I hadn’t really thought about kids and Kindles but I think that’s true.
It is something we need to think about. I’m a fan of paper too but she is right it’s the way of the future, and whatever gets them to read. We still use books for kids – I just read my first iPad book.
Twitter: Adothemomalog
Thanks Morag for sharing your awesome tips. Leo is amazing!
Twitter: MamaWantsThis
Thanks Alison. (-:
Twitter: Adothemomalog
Very interesting! I love to read how others are raising their children and how they are turning out! I’m going to stick around and read more of your blog…just stopping by from Thoughtful Thursday!
Thanks,
Twitter: Adothemomalog
This post is really interesting..Thanks a lot for sharing this tips..
I am blown away! Thanks for sharing this.
I like the balance of allowing technology and yet restricting it to a certain level. I wonder at what age it’s okay to start allowing computer games, though? My friend’s 4 year old has had to wear an eye patch to correct 30% loss of his vision, due apparently to too much viewing on the computer. His eye specialist said children eye’s aren’t sufficiently developed for the screen until age 7 (?)
I recently read an article that said not to let preschoolers use video games – to wait until they are older due to issues like these, and then again – all in moderation! Sounds like your friend was a bit OTT w the video games if he has eye problems ?
Twitter: Adothemomalog
Leo is an amazing child and I think Morag provides some really sound advice here. The line I love is about offering too much praise for the little things… “too much emphasis on making kids feel “special” for being able stick googly eyes on a colour-book frog picture and not enough on fostering concentration and practice in improving their creative work.” So true.
Twitter: take2mommy
I think that’s a particularly American trait she’s referring to although I’m sure it’s happening global but we are probably the most OTT in the praise for google eyes category!
Twitter: Adothemomalog
Wow, Leo sounds like an amazing kid, and it’s kind of you, Ado, to ask Morag to share her experience as a mother with all of us here.
When I was a child, my parents stressed the importance of academics so much, that there was not much time left for anything else. Ironically, I grew up to become quite an artsy person (complete with the mood swings too! ha!) although it was never encouraged by my parents.
So when I have my daughter, I do try to expose her to as many things that would nurture her creativity as much as possible. It’s interesting to read about what kind of surroundings Leo grows up in and the influences he receives from both his parents.
Having said that, what Morag said, about letting kids be themselves and not pressuring them into one way or another was very wise. Also, what she said about kids finding role models other than their parents… I found that to be very insightful. I’ll definitely keep that in mind.
Great parenting tips here, Ado!
Twitter: dosweatthesmall
I thought her comments about letting other people into their lives to inspire them is really a good idea too. Very insightful. (-:
Twitter: Adothemomalog
The kid was super cute – accent and the way his eyebrows went up and down like his villains.
Those are some key points at the end there.
…and when he describes their little beady eyes and smiles!
Twitter: Adothemomalog
I love this blog – thanks A for guesting me – and for all your great feedback. God – I think I;m great altogether now!
Twitter: katekerrigan
Well you are, Morag! (-:
Twitter: Adothemomalog
It is nice to learn that her son is the youngest cartoonist in Ireland. I wish my kids would be creative enough to express themselves through poems, drawings and other creative stuff. Maybe I should try not to have technology in their rooms. Thanks for the interesting tips.
that little guy must be very special! but that isn’t a surprise as i see his parents. He’s a lucky boy to have the chance to let his gift grow and be able to evolve. Such a sweet family they are.