Monday Listicles - 10 ways celebrities are like us. I’m going to modify it and list 10 of my own celebrity sightings. Apologies in advance for my pathetic attempts at name-dropping.
P.S.: I DID NOT SLEEP WITH RICK SPRINGFIELD.
1. I know someone who slept with Rick Springfield back when the song Jessie’s Girl was in the Top 10, when he was a hottie on General Hospital.
(IT WASN’T ME.)
2. In college I waited tables, and one of my regular customers was Carlos Santana. He was the most polite customer, very soft-spoken. One day I was in a car with a group of friends and a vintage Citroen pulled up beside us at the stop light. Everyone in the car started freaking out because it was Carlos Santana! I was in the front passenger seat and my window was open, and Carlos – okay, okay, Mr. Santana – was driving the Citroen and his window was open. To the amazement of everyone, including me, he smiled and said “Hi, Ado.” (only he didn’t use my nickname, he used my real name.) It was my moment. My OMG moment.
Carlos Santana knew who I was. I mattered.
Later that year, I was having dinner at a restaurant and he came in with his entourage, causing quite a stir in the restaurant! I kept finding reasons to walk past his table, hoping he would stop everything and say, “Hi, Ado!” but he…didn’t…recognize…me. I was crushed – crushed!
3. When I was a new mom I was walking around Phoenix Lake in Ross with my new-moms group and our strollers when Sean Penn jogged by – shirtless and sweating – followed by Robin Wright! We all knew he lived across the street from the fire house, and some of us had seen him at the grocery store, but never shirtless and sweating! So all of us simultaneously shit ourselves, of course. I got so flustered I let go of my stroller (we were on a hill), and in an effort to save my stroller another mom let go of her stroller. Oh, it was a sad mess. There is something just so pathetic about the idea of a herd of new moms losing their composure like that – en masse – at the prospect of a hunky movie star running past.
4. Bonnie Raitt lived in my hometown and dated an older friend of mine for a while. We call this friend “the perpetual bachelor,” because he’s a serial monogamist, a Clint Eastwoody world-adventurer type who makes documentaries that no one has ever seen. I don’t know what it is about him but he makes all the women swoon. Anyway, he would come to our annual sing-for-your-supper Christmas parties and this one year he invited Bonnie. I was beside myself with anticipation! I had visions of her bringing a group of other Grammy winning singers – maybe even Bono! – to our little sing-along, but she had something else to do so she couldn’t make it. But she nearly came. Bonnie Raitt nearly came to my Christmas party.
That right there nearly makes me famous.
5. Way back before she was famous I took a semester-long novel writing class from Ann Lamott, who grew up in my community. I’ve run into her all over town and at writer’s workshops, probably 16,000 times – her brother even came to my wedding – but she never seems to recognize me, so I don’t like her one little bit. Love her writing though.
6. My father was once in an elevator with Jim Jones of the People’s Temple. My father said he was creepy – and my father had a lot of creepy friends, so if he said the guy was creepy…that’s really saying something.
7. A few weeks ago, I was in the same room as Nigel Lythgoe, which means Nigel and I are practically on a first name basis.
I DID NOT SLEEP WITH RICK SPRINGFIELD.
8. When I was single and working in San Francisco, I used to stop every morning for a to-go coffee at the Dipsea Cafe in Mill Valley. Most mornings I would see George Lucas sitting alone at a table, eating his breakfast. I swear to God that man had a fierce crush on me. Fierce. Okay, well, maybe not. Maybe I imagined it.
9. When I lived in Ireland I saw Liam Neeson and Natasha Richardson riding their bicycles down Baggott Street! And get this - one day I was walking through Temple Bar and Bono came walking down the street alone right past me! I’m not one to throw myself at celebrities but let me tell you, I considered it. He was just smiling at everybody and no one was pestering him for his autograph, which I found very, very strange. So I got a grip on myself and just walked past him.
Then one night about a year later I was sitting in the pub at the Baggot Street Inn and there he was again, sitting up at the bar just like a person! Was Bono stalking me? You be the judge! Okay, actually he was sitting with the lead singer of the Corrs! Of course, I nearly died! I hysterically pointed him out to the group of Irish people I was sitting with and do you know what their reaction was? —> They shrugged and said stuff like, “Bono’s a gobshite.”
Apparently, Irish people think famous people are assholes. Jeez.
10. By far the most famous famous, memorable person I ever met was Czeslaw Milosz. I don’t care about all the other celebrity sightings – he was the one person I really wanted to meet, and when I met him that man gave me a bear hug and it’s such a heart-warming story I’m going to write about it in a post, so stay tuned!
I. DID. NOT.
Linking up with Stasha!
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