There are a lot of things that make me go WTF pretty much everyday. One of the reasons why we no longer have a television is that the news – those ads for Viagra and drugs for depression – makes me have way too many WTF?! moments.
The news only worries the mom in me. It makes me worry about things I never worried about before having kids like: the future. The state of our planet. What will our children’s world look like in 25 years? Why is our culture so obsessed with the vacuous Kardashians? What if the N. Koreans or the Iranians get their hands on nuclear warheads? Why we can’t all just get along? and so on.
I still have access to news via the Internet so I tend to get a lot of WTF’s?! from Yahoo news, especially in the category of crime. For some reason even though it horrifies me, I am compelled to read crime stories. Maybe it’s the mom in me trying to keep an eye on all the bad things that can possibly happen out there. Lately there have been a lot of bad things in the news.
Here’s my list of things that make me go WTF?!:
1. Moms who drag tired tots through malls, ignoring the toddler’s cries so they can browse. I can’t stand it. This bothers me so much I generally have to leave the store.
Also, Shopper Mom, when your tired child has had enough and is crying hard in a store, it has an effect on the rest of us because the public is a kind of tribe, and we can’t relax until we know you are tending to your child. But – you’re ignoring your child so you can shop! WTF?!
2. Tribal ear piercings on suburban American youth. When I see those horrible earlobe holes big enough to shove a football through, I think to myself – unless you are a rock star, or a Pygmy tribesman, how will you ever find gainful employment? WTF?!
When I see someone like this I think, “Was your relationship with your mother that bad?” and: “WTF?!”
3. The recent stories of cannibalism in the news. WTF?!!! Since the face eating thing all went down last week, I cannot get the gruesome face-eater out of my mind. The parent in me is so frightened of “Bath Salts,” the new drug that makes people do things that are beyond our definition of horrible, like that cross-dressing pigmy goat killer.
I am not a drug taker or advocate but whatever happened to good old fashioned drugs, like pot? These Bath Salts are a cocktail drug of meth, PCP, LSD, rat poison, 409 cleaner, bat-shit crazy, and voodoo or something. They make otherwise sane people do psycho things, like eat people’s faces off, that really worry the parent in me. WTF?!
4. When my husband empties the dishwasher and feels the need to announce it to the entire family. WTF?!
5. Two stories in the news of parents accidentally killing their children last week. One was a mom of four who came home drunk after drinking a fifth of vodka and slept with her 3-week-old son, asphyxiating him. The dad had warned her not to co-sleep with her newborn because he saw that she was drunk (but why didn’t he take the baby from her if she was that intoxicated? I think he may have had to go to work but I’m not sure). The other was a mom of five who backed her SUV out of her garage without seeing that her five children were out there playing. She severely injured two of her kids, and her eight-year-old died. This sad accident just horrified me – apparently she stepped on the gas peddle thinking it was the brake.
6. A WTF?! story from last week:
On the last day of school a dad I don’t know dropped a tot off in the carline. The tot was sobbing because she didn’t have any shoes on. So poor Mrs. K-, the carline lady, had to console her and help her out of the car. As the dad drove off I heard Mrs. K- ask her, “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” and the little girl said she didn’t have her shoes on. So Mrs. K- shouted after the car that was driving away, “Where are her shoes?” The dad shouted, “In the bag!” while speeding off in his gold minivan.
Well.
Enter Judgey-pants Me, as usual. I am a total busy-body and cannot for the life of me keep my judgey-pants opinions to myself. It’s a flaw, I know. So here it was the last day of school and I see this dad practically dump his hysterical child at the carline lady and he didn’t even have the time to help her put her shoes on? And poor Mrs. K- had to find out where the girl’s shoes are. So…
I looked at him. Oh yes, I did. I gave that man the stink-eye. Luckily I had my big bug sunglasses on so he couldn’t see the look in my eyes but he could probably see my head turn as I walked in the sunshine back to my car staring at him, dumbfounded. He looked back at me while speeding off.
I was thinking: “What a rude person you are.”
Note: For all I know, he was an ER doctor in a hurry to save a life at the nearest ER. Or maybe he had IBS and had to rush to the nearest port-a-potty. I have no idea why he dumped his hysterical child at carline without any shoes on and yes, I do understand that it’s none of my beeswax. Somebody stop me!
As I drove out of the parking lot I was thinking about how rude some parents are, in general, to people they perceive as “the help” – to their children’s teachers, and to the teacher’s assistants who are there everyday at the carline to greet their children. This is a total WTF?! for me because the way I see it – these people are there to help nurture my children so I’m going to try my best to do things like be nice to them and get to know them and at least make sure if I have to dump a hysterical child who wants to be wearing shoes at the carline, that she is wearing shoes.
So I get into my car and drive out of the parking lot and onto the road. The car coming towards me in the opposite direction is a gold minivan with what looked like a carbon copy of the mad dad in it, only he had his arm fully outstretched out the car window and was flipping the bird, right at me. Now, I can be an awful driver at times but I hadn’t even had the time to begin to drive like an asshole, so my driving could not have been the impetus for Flippy the Bird. And there were no other cars on the road: just me. So either it is a big, huge coincidence, or it was the mad dad who was irked by the look I gave him after seeing him deposit his child at the school.
I will never know.
That would be a pretty big coincidence.
But seriously, if it was a dad: WTF?! My kids attend a small, alternative, AMI Montessori school, and as far as I’m concerned – stereotypically, Montessori parents do not flip the bird at one another. So maybe it was a fluke, another mad dad in another gold minivan? Hmm…
I see it as the Universe flipping me a gigantic, well-deserved end-of-the-school-year bird as a karmic reminder to STOP JUDGING OTHER PARENTS SO HARSHLY already. But will I stop? Probably not. I think all parents judge other parents, secretly in our minds. And I think although I’d like to stop, I’m not sure that it’s even possible.
Anyway, since number 6 was such a long one, it’s also standing in for 7, 8, 9 and 10. And there you have my list of 10!
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So, Ms Judgey-pants…at least you try to see the other side of things. That’s pretty normal in my opinion. And we’ve all had those thoughts at one time or the other. Busy parents have so much on their minds these days…trying to do everything right and of course, not even coming close. But trying. Nuff said. Your numbers 2 and 3…oh freaking lordy! I can’t believe that stuff goes on. It just numbifies me.
Numbifies me too. PS: Love that word, numbify.
10 Things That Make Me Go WTF? http://t.co/hOaZXtqM via @sharethis
I’d bet my right arm the mother rightly divorced bird-flipping dad and the poor daughter is on her court-ordered visit. Stopping by to grab your ad square for yeah write. Your post has me all stabby.
I love you Erica. (-: I just do!
I would have been judging too. I can’t help it sometimes – but then I know others are totally judging me for some of my parenting decisions, and then I feel bad.
Great list!!! I was almost gagging reading number 2. WTF!!! Like you I don’t particularly like to watch the news as I find it so depressing and am a worry wart ergo my husband says I live in a cave. Too bad I can still hear him after he unloads the dishwasher.
Oh I’m laughing!
Wow – that man sounds like a real tool. I’m right there judging with you on that one.
Oh dear lord. Gold mini-vans, pierced youth, crime stories…I need a nap. I saw a woman once who had her cheeks pierced – many semi-circles of wire running through her cheek – many pieces of wire. She rattled like a christmas tree full of ornaments. The ear gauges really get me though – what’s the message there? I mean, what ARE you trying to tell us? And there are the husbands who ARE trying to tell us that they: put away the laundry, emptied the dishwasher, picked up a gallon of milk at the store. But seldom all on the same day, and rarely with any regularity. Isn’t that special, hmm?
I don’t really think it’s “judgey” to think dropping your crying kid off is wrong. That totally sucks. Poor kid!
I was hoping someone would say that. I mean: WTF???!!!
A nice rant all around.
The whole out of control drug situation these days has me entirely way too freaked out…I think about what kids are doing NOW…WTF are they going to be doing when my kids get to that age? I basically get myself into panic attack mode – which is why I can’t watch the news either. Too much, tooooo much insanity!!!
And I had to giggle at your flippy the bird rant – because it was hilarious…and I could totally picture you and giving him the stink eye behind your big sunglasses. I would’ve judged the crap outta him too Ado.
Me too – I’m with you on the WTF does the future hold for my kids re. this scary drug stuff.
Re. the mad dad – I should probably carry a small sign around with me that says: “YES, I AM JUDGING THE CRAP OUT OF YOU.”
Being judgey is what makes society work. Otherwise we have anarchy. If good people didn’t give bad parents dirty looks, the bad parents would feel free to be even worse. Go judgey people!!
Well said!
Oh I totally judge those parents with the screaming kids in the store too, the ones whose children are obviously overtired and just plain over it. Take your kids home already! And the dad in the car rider line….oh I would have done more than stare. I’d have taken my sunglasses off right in front of him so he KNEW without a doubt I was staring at him. I’m classy like that. What a jerkface.
Then maybe you would’ve been treated to a double-bird? (-:
I can’t watch/ read news about children dying, especially those caused by their parents. It makes me sick.
Also, far be it for me to say, don’t judge. I try not to with mother’s choices (the usual breast vs formula etc), but it does irk me and brings out the judgey pants in me when I witness things like what you describe – mothers who drag tired children around, ignoring their needs, and fathers who drop shoeless children off at school. So, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
Whew. You know – before I became a parent I really used to consider myself a non-judgmental person. But things changed apres kids…
Thank you oh so much for the dishwasher comment in the middle of freaking me out about cannibalism and running over children. Only you could make me laugh out loud in the middle of all of that.
And I say you should do a victory lap of success for being flipped the bird. Your look was lethal, it hit its mark, and the bird was your confirmation of the kill. Message sent and received! Ellen
Well I feel very much better about everything now! Now I’m looking at the bird as a kind of emotional trophy!
I never read the news. Ever. And this just confirmed I shouldn’t. And even though I tend not to judge ( because I am never around other adult humans) I would totally have given this dude a stink eye. Unless he had a date with Heidi Klum. Then I would give him a double stink eye. Wonder if he had a tribal piercing
Oh that killed me laughing. (-:
Okay — it would have been hard to miss the guy, eating away at the other guy, but I didn’t hear of the mother who rolled over on her child. (or the SUV scenario either.) And the bird dad? Well, that kind of school drop off rage hasn’t happened around here, yet. Crazy.
I think mad dad needs to taper back on his Starbucks consumption.
10 Things That Make Me Go WTF? http://t.co/0ygY3Hfs via @adothemomalog #MondayListicles
Tribal ear piercings on suburban ANY youth is like double WTF?!
A young girl who reads this blog told me she has one of those big ol’ holes in her ears and said “is it wrong that I think it looks weird on other people but when I see it on myself it doesn’t?” Strange but true!
So, since I’m a mandated reporter of child abuse and neglect, dropping a kid off without shoes IS my business and I would have reported that piece of cheese. Maybe nothing would come of it, but he needs to know that’s not acceptable. (And neither is flicking the bird when people can’t control their visceral reaction to horrid parenting).
Yes he def has issues if indeed it was him, and I’m thinking he needs him some Starbucks rehab and a Proper Etiquette for Mad Dads At School class.
I’m mad at that dad!!! If I knew where you lived, I’d be tempted to lie in wait for him and kick him in the shins, steal his shoes and leave him crying on the curb without even a carpool lady to save him….
Too funny, I used the same pic you did for your #2 as I did on my list. lol. I just don’t get it, either.
pretty sure non shoe clad screaming child would thank you for giving dad the stink eye. getting the middle finger salute just confirms your judgement was spot on.
If my kid ever wanted a piercing like that, I’d agree…..only if they let me make the hole. pretty sure that discussion would come full stop right there.
Me too, I really hate seeing those things you have listed that make you utter WTF.
I like to look at both sides too, and raising an extremely oppositional, inflexible child with severe ADD and sensory disorders has made me so much more empathetic than I would be if I had neurotypical kids.
I have dropped my child places with no shoes, unbrushed hair, breakfast in hand. Many times it is a choice the child made. Being late for school is not an option, so if they are not ready at 7:30, we leave the house in whatever state they are in. It is traumatic for them, and it is also a tough lesson to be accountable for their choices and face consequences. The minute I read that story, I saw my daughter, on a bad morning. And me on my worse morning. And me asking her to put her shoes on in the car and her digging in even farther and falling apart. And if you gave me the look I don’t know what I would have done…