In the car this morning my kids and I were once again talking about politics (for the record, they are the ones who always bring it up, not me!). Fiona saw a “Montgomery County for Mitt Romney” sign, and was amazed that someone who supported Mr. Romney had climbed a telephone poll to hang it up high. Fiona said, “Wouldn’t it be nice if both candidates had each other’s best qualities, and we could vote for both of them?”
After which Ella replied, “I don’t like Mitt Romney.”
Barmitt Obamney for President?
We are an awkward two-party household. My husband is pro-Romney, I’m an Obama mama. So political discussions are tricky, at our house. (I take solace in the fact that my husband is not an American citizen so doesn’t have a vote.) (-:
What seems to have nudged my children over the edge and into the Obama camp were Romney’s comments about getting rid of Big Bird, which appalled them. (I had nothing to do with it!)
So a friend of mine who volunteers for the Obama campaign came by the house while my husband was at work, ahem, to plant an Obama sign on our front lawn.
My husband came home that night and said, “Why’d you lock the house? Were you afraid all the Romney supporters in the neighborhood were going to come up here with pitchforks?” We laughed and laughed. There are no other signs in our neighborhood which is mostly all pro-Romney, and the fact that no one is really comfortable in this year discussing which candidate they’re rooting for kind of disturbs me.
My husband and I had a “how would you feel if I put a Romney sign up on the lawn” discussion, which was awkward because I had to acknowledge that if I’m as open as I like to imagine myself to be, then he can put a Romney sign on the right side of the driveway, beside my Obama sign. It would mean that all the neighbors can yuk it up and joke about how the Shwarzeneggers used to have the Republican/Democrat signs on their driveway, too, and look how that turned out.
I concluded that I would be okay with him planting a Romney sign on our front lawn, too, but I don’t think he has enough time in his busy schedule to find out where to get a sign, pay for it, and so on – so, unless he’s going to pilfer one from someone else’s front lawn I don’t think Mitt will be making an appearance any time soon at our house.
The other night at the costume store, I saw a Mitt Romney mask and wondered aloud if we should get one for Daddy for Halloween. Ella replied, quite loudly, “No! I don’t like Mitt Romney. Get him a Big Bird mask.” Fiona and I shushed her because we were out in public and Ella tends to say things – provocative things – quite loudly, when we’re out in public. So we reminded her to keep her voice down, because other people might like Mr. Romney and we didn’t want to offend them. Just then, a Hispanic boy of about six passed by Ella and said conspiratorially, “I don’t like Romney, either.” And I swear to God – the two youngsters exchanged a knowing political glance – kind of like, “We’re in it for the big yellow bird.”
I’m telling you – I’m shocked at the level of interest in politics kids are showing nowadays. I had no idea about politics when I was that little. Is it because of the Big Bird debacle? It seems like all the kids are talking politics these days – from Ella’s class on up to Fi’s, they are debating it and discussing the candidates, interested in the election – really getting into it. Wow.
So this morning, after we saw the Romney sign, and Ella said, “I don’t like Mitt Romney,” I got on my soap box.
I told them that it’s wonderful for them to have and to express their political opinions so long as they are not just copying mommy’s opinion, or daddy’s opinion. I said it is really, really important for them to learn about the facts from all sides of the campaign, to think about these facts as they pertain to the things they are interested in, like the environment, or the deficit, education, healthcare, wars, taxes, immigration, women’s rights – and come to their own conclusion.
I really do not want them parroting my opinions, I said.
I explained how when I was growing up we were not really allowed to have our own political opinions. My parents were staunchly right-wing Republicans, clones of Ron and Nancy Reagan. I knew from a young age not to share my opinions with them. If I did, my opinions were poo-poo’d, minimized, and even ridiculed. So in our house we were not able to have balanced, fact-based discussions about politics – everything was charged, emotional, and there were no facts – so I just stopped sharing my opinions with them.
Then, when I turned 18, I ran to the polls to cast my vote. My problem was, though, that in all my exuberance of youth I wasn’t really voting based on facts – I was voting to rebel against my parents. And this, I said, wasn’t informed voting. It was just childish.
After I told them this story, I was fully expecting Fiona to say what she had said after our last political discussion: “Mommy, those three minutes you talked about politics were the longest three minutes of my life.”
Instead, she said something that surprised and touched me. She said,
“The bad parenting you got when you were growing up has made you into a really good parent, Mommy.”
how sweet to hear it from your child. It must have left you feeling amazing…As I am also not an American citizen I don’t need to think about the election over and over but it’s really thoughtful how you explained the situation to your kids. At one point in my life I caught myself copying my parents’ political views as there never really was a moment when I was allowed to have mine. If I could I’d vote Obama for sure, not so much for him as for Michelle
Barmitt Obamney for President? Talking to my children about #politics: http://t.co/9pn7SgUI
I’m touched by what Fiona said. I’m an ACOA as well as in recovery myself, and I have a 14 year old son. As I have learned more about myself and how I was raised, my parenting has changed, and improved – I’ve learned that there are other options besides repeating mistakes which were made during my childhood. My son and I have a wonderful relationship now. I was recently told by a friend that my son is lucky to have me, and it made me cry, so I have a hint of how you must have felt when hearing what your daughter said. You’re a good mom, Ado.
Leslie, I’m so glad to have you (my dream reader – an ACOA parent in recovery) come by and leave a wonderful comment like this. Thank you. There is just so much damage from alcoholism all around us – but then there are these stories like yours, that just – well, mean so much. So glad to hear from you and bravo on being the best mom you can be given your back-story. (-:
Lol yeah they are into politics young these days. I was showing V the video from the Santa Claus for president web site and she watched the vid. I asked her “So what did you think? Should I vote for Santa?”. She shook her head and said disgustedly “Mom he didn’t say a thing about jobs creation!”
We also encourage V to form her own opinions. My parents and Mike’s were fairly open to letting us do that. My parents were overbearing in many ways but they did want me to form my own political views for some reason.
V’s quote about job creation – priceless.
And hey, your parents had some good points, politically speaking!
Being from California my children ages 7 and 11 have an opinion on everything and not necessarily the tree hugging liberal Berkeleyites type of opinion either – not the stereotypical Californian everyone not from here everyone thinks – yes there are Republicans here ! Haha! But the point being, children have the most refreshing and amazing perspectives about adult issues with the simplist in your face solutions. Which we are paying “professionals” millions to answer and analyze the worlds problems, still to no avail. Want a real honest answer – ask a child!
That is so true – ask a child, they give you a simple, straightforward answer. And congrats to you for raising kids in California who are able to figure out for themselves what they think – being from there myself and now on the East Coast i have noticed a huge amount of pressure to “lean left” – and an awful lot of closed-mindedness to people who might want to lean right!
I was SOOOO political even at an early age. In first grade, I remember just “not trusting” reagan (there’s something funny about that guy, I thought). When Mondale had Ferraro on the Democratic ticket, I was like – holy yeah! Of course a woman should be Vice-President! (I really knew nothing about their politics, but I was still wary of that Reagan fella).
I was in India visiting during Indhira Gandhi’s assassination and remember being so into understanding what the heck was going on. (This happened around the same time that Reagan kicked Mondale’s ass).
In the 7th grade, I campaigned heavily for Dukakis. I took a sick day when Bush one. A day of mourning at 13.
I was a NUT.
What an interesting child you were. “A day of mourning when Bush won.” Ha. I would have gotten along great with you when we were kids, I’ll bet. (-:
First of all I am Canadian (or Australian depending on who you ask) and I am also the most politically uninterested person there could possibly be on this plant (though we follow US politics here probably more than our own, however pitiful that might be to admit) I don’t believe a single word ANY politician says HOWEVER this was so sweet – what a beautiful mother-child moment. I’m so happy she didn’t say blah-blah-vaginas-blibbity-blah-blah-blah-politics. Truly lovely. xo (and she so hit the nail on the head didn’t she?)
She did hit the nail on the head – I’m going to remember that moment and cherish it as one of the highlights of parenting. PS: how’s the weather Down Under? (-;
Oh and that photo? Is totally freaking me the hell out.
Isn’t it awful?! It’s just so…wrong.
My 9 year old insisted on watching every minute of every debate, and engaged me in a lively conversation about the economy the other day in the car after school. I think my parents let us form our own opinions but we were pretty well steeped in the left leaning environment they inhabited. I think certainly kids should be allowed to question, express opinions and decide for themselves their political bent, however, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a little friendly political proselytizing between mother and child.
Maria I so agree with you and the truth is I probably had that conversation w them because I have done quite a lot of mother- daughter chats explaining why I lean left and not right…maybe a few too many! (-;
This piece The Momalog wrote is fabulous. Mom is an Obama supporter and Dad is for Romney. It all turns into a… http://t.co/CR3eLCr4
Thanks Lillian! x
I’m amazed as well as how well informed the kids are these days with their mock elections and all. My husband is a member of the Libertarian party and we have discussed Gary Johnson and his views with the children. My daughter brought it up in school and they just nodded their heads and kept going. I’m a registered Democrat and will go vote early tomorrow. It’s my very first time and I’m very proud to be finally able to do it.
Susie, one of the conversations we still need to have w them is all about the other parties and their candidates, thanks for the reminder – and you are smart to go vote early and avoid crowds. (-:
I love this! We are an all Obama house here. My 8yo had a homework assignment about the two candidates. It was a chart listing some differences (including fav foods and stuff). But, it wasn’t inflammatory or anything, which I liked. We live in banker territory so lots of republicans!
I’m with Ella – what a wonderful mom you are. I love that you urged your children to form their own opinions after gathering the facts. Way to go, mama! My husband and I are on opposite sides of this election also. We joke about it and brainstorm elaborate ways to keep the other from the voting booth to avoid cancelling each other out. Fun times. Great post!
Mary, thanks for your comments – so glad to know there are other “two party” couples out there!